Republican Lightbulb

Q: How many Republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Four hundred and seventy one:

12 to investigate Clinton's involvement in the failure of the old bulb;

23 to deregulate the light bulb industry;

16 to cut funding for alternative lighting R&D;

34 to cut the marginal tax rate on high-wattage light bulbs;

9 to threaten trade sanctions if Germany and Japan don't start buying more 110-volt bulbs;

53 to design a block grant so the states can change the bulb;

41 to chat with defence contractors about equipping everyone in the building with night-vision gear instead;

And 283 to pass a law making it illegal to discuss naked bulbs, or screwing anything, on the Internet.